From the disturbed mind

Is graduate education a good choice?

2011-06-21T10:12:00.003-04:00

Immediately after college I worked at a major Pharma company for about 18 months. With my BS I was makign $37K a year. I had decided that I would go back to graduate school to get my PhD before I even started that job.
Now I am a post-doc. I am less appreciated by my boss, I make the same salary I made with a BS, have more responsibility and work much longer hours. I believe that my thought processes have been refined, but my world view is drastically skewed by my experience in graduate school.
I found the following infographic this AM that summarizes my experience fairly well. If you are considering graduate education, take a look at this and really think it over whether pursuit of a PhD is really what you want to do for the next 5-10 years.

Via: Online PhD Programs

Mitochondria, Aging and Exercise

2011-02-23T21:14:00.000-05:00

Mice are useful scientific research tools. In world of basic scientific research, mice are easy to handle cost effective to maintain as a colony, they share many of the same biochemical pathways as humans and are readily manipulated in the lab. Sure, some of the research is difficult to stomach, and mice are not perfect analogs to humans, but for understanding the basic science in human life, mice provide the one of the best, most relevant models of mammalian biology available to basic life sciences researchers.

Most people learned in high school biology class that mitochondria are the powerhouse of the cell. Mitochondria the bulk of the energy that our cells use to maintain their normal functions, whether that be repairing themselves, communicating, responding to communications, growing, dying or other essential functions. In order for energy to produced, the mitochondria rely on a small piece of DNA known as the mitochondrial DNA (mtDNA.) This DNA encodes genes that make proteins that are parts of the protein complexes that help make energy in the mitochondria.

Just like the any DNA, the mitochondrial DNA is subjected to stress which can impair the intergrity of the information contained by the mtDNA. In many cases, DNA damage can be repaired, but if not repaired, the DNA can be mutated. Mutations can change the information in either a small way or by wholesale deletion of the information. Over the course of a lifetime, mutations in the mtDNA can accumulate and have been associated with aging and disease. Whether mutations in mtDNA cause or are caused by aging has been an open question.

A couple years ago, two groups independently developed transgenic mice strains that had a tendency to accumulate mutations in the mtDNA. These mice showed an extremely accelerated aging phenotype. Over the course of two years, these mice had all the hallmarks of a 3-4 year old mice (normal lifespan.) The theory was that the mutation of the mtDNA caused the mice to age in an accelerated fashion. In subsequent years, research has shown that the aging phenotype was due to the wholesale deletions of the DNA rather than the point mutations.

Today, some new research was brought to my attention. A group took one of these mice strains that mutate their mtDNA and subjected them to repetitive endurance exercise. The mice showed decreased symptoms of age-related phenotypes.

Why is this important? If mutations in mtDNA can cause aging in humans just like it can in mice, which plenty of circumstantial evidence suggests that it may, the importance of lifestyle factors may be more critical than previously considered. Sure, smoking can cause cancer, but the importance of other factors, like diet, exercise, sleep patterns and micronutrient intake may be involved in maintaining proper cellular metabolism, endocrine functions, maintaining a healthy population of mitochondria and limiting the accumulation of mitochondrial DNA mutations. Given the average American lifestyle, largely sedentary at home and at work, high glycemic, nutrient bereft diet and a pharmaceutical industry more interested in treating conditions than preserving health and longevity. If by making some compromises in our lifestyle, we can life longer, healthier lives maybe we should consider those compromises. Moreover, if the FDA, American Heart Association and American Diabetes Association recommended diets are not working, as Americans continue to get fatter and suffer more chronic health issues, maybe we should consider some outside the box compromises.

Root Canal

2011-02-22T18:45:00.005-05:00

I neglected going to the dentist for a couple years, I know, I'm bad. The last time I had gone to the dentist, it was to get a cap and crown put on a tooth that had been the subject of a root canal. I had no real problems for the last several years, I brushed and flossed regularly. When I recently went to the dentist, I had no cavities, very little tartar and rather healthy gums. Good for me!

However, I had been experiencing some discomfort in a tooth which brought about my recent visit to the dentist. Some X-rays suggested that I needed a root canal. OK, not that I want to get a root canal, but it's better than walking around in pain or without teeth.

Today I went to see the endodontist. He did some X-rays then things started to go a little weird. He wasn't so sure that the tooth the my dentist suggested needed a root canal actually needed a root canal. In addition, he suspected a significant infection of the tooth next to the suspect tooth, the one that had previously been subjected to a root canal. According to him, it could only be diagnosed by employing a 3D CAT scan, which would not be covered by my dental insurance, but might be covered by my medical insurance. The scan would cost $300. Being one who values my teeth and doesn't want an infected tooth to cause any complications, I agreed.

I think to myself, is this really necessary or is this guy really just trying to pay off a fancy new toy? Well, I was led down the hall into a room with a big shiny machine and decided it was the later. I was positioned in the machine and it whirled around my head for a couple minutes. A couple minutes later, the endodontist comes in and shows me a set of pictures that confirm the infection and further suggest that the old root canal had only covered 2 of the 3 roots in the bad tooth. To my eyes, the pictures were not that much more informative than the standard X-rays. Maybe he could tell more, but he wasn't sharing any of that information.

Was the $300 CAT scan necessary, I'm not sure, hopefully insurance covers the cost, but only time will tell. If it assists with targeting the treatment, OK. Still not sure that it needed to cost $300, other than paying off the cost of the unit.

So I went in for a root canal, got a CAT scan, and came out with no root canal, suggestions for a series treatments and significantly poorer. Not really happy with the events of the day.

Why I don't like going to the doctor...

2011-02-17T08:00:00.001-05:00

I'm generally a healthy male. Yes, I am overweight and boarder-line hypertensive, but I really don't have any health problems at the moment (aside from a slight head cold.) However, I really don't like going to see physicians, why? Let me explain.

I'm not afraid of physicians, I respect what they do, their years of training and their ability to diagnose and treat some problems.

I am lucky enough to get to interact with physicians in training quite a bit and honestly, they terrify me. Not because they are bad people or anything like that, but because the medical school curriculum is so demanding, I get the sense there is little time to really fully learn anything. If there's one thing that I've learned from watching FOX NEWS, it's that a little bit of information is extremely dangerous. Further, many seem to regard their training as the ultimate accumulation of knowledge regarding human biology. Further, I'm not really how many of these individuals ended up in medical school anyhow, with little knowledge of chemistry, physics and a moderately passable knowledge of biochemistry. Maybe anatomy and physiology is all that was studied as undergrad pre-med major, but this hardly qualifies you to authorize people to take potentially dangerous chemicals into their body. Sure, there's Medical Chemistry and Pharmacology taught in med school, but evidence of a working knowledge of these subjects has eluded those with whom I've interacted.

Now not all physicians are fresh out of school, some are actual practicing physicians who've been seeing patients for years. These guys scare me the most! Sure they can be amicable and have excellent bed-side manorisms, but I always find myself wondering whether they've kept up with the advances of modern medicine. A major part of what I do is to read the most current literature, synthesize new ideas and put those ideas to the test. If a physician was trained 30 years ago, I wonder how current their knowledge really is. Are they going to seminars every weekend? Are they just listening to pharmaceutical reps pushing drugs? Do they even have a concept of molecular medicine?

I'm amazed every time I speak with a physician how little the average physician knows about modern scientific research. If medicine is to be practiced effectively, it should be the pinnacle of knowledge the base of which was laid in high school and college. The human body consists of systems, systems consist of organs, organs consist of tissues, tissues consist of cells, cells consist of biochemical molecules, biochemical molecules are fundamentally chemicals with biological properties that ultimately follow the rules of physics. Without knowing physics, chemistry, biochemistry and cellular biology,how can one hope to understand tissue, organ and system biology? Further how can one possibly contemplate how a drug designed to stimulate or repress a biochemical pathway without adequate, current knowledge of how cells, tissues, organs and systems act, communicate and counteract that drug?

This is what goes through my mind in the waiting room...

2011-02-16T07:10:00.000-05:00

Relearning Old Lessons

I like to think that I'm living during the peak of human civilization. We have ready access to plenty of good food, high quality water, literature, communication, technology, health care and face little threat of acute disease, predation, starvation and isolation. We've controlled our environment and our collective living conditions to create communities which preserve our continued well-being.

However, from time to time, it becomes necessary to look back on the lessons we've learned either individually or collectively, and consider how we achieved this state of being.

Recently I've had to revisit some work that I had done several years ago. This is an opportunity for me to augment and improve the conclusions derived from this work, but I've been stymied at the start of this re-visitation because I trusted someone else. Years ago, I learned an important lesson about how best to do what needed to be done, but in this effort, I deferred to someone with more experience than myself to assist me. For the last several days I've invested a ton of effort for no return because of this trust. I knew that my system worked, but the recommended changes to my protocol would conserve precious and costly reagents. So by embracing the recommendation of a more experienced individual, I figured I could be more efficient in my work. Unfortunately, the recommendations caused my efforts to be in vain resulting in depression, frustration, stress and ultimately more incurred cost. I knew what I needed to do but listened to someone else who, even though my best interest was in her heart, made a recommendation that resulted in failure.

A similar lesson can be learned when considering my experiences trying to find a diet and exercise regiment. When I was a child growing up in a Catholic household, we had fish on Friday throughout the year and attempted to fast on Fridays during Lent. From a dietary point of view, both fish intake and intermittent fasting are things I've come to embrace as part of my primal/ paleo lifestyle. Similar to Jewish Kosher Laws which were developed to prevent food-born disease, these Catholic traditions, if embraced fully, can improve health and longevity, but have fallen from consciousness as society has secularized. As we've embraced the land of plenty, society has grown obese and suffers from many more health problems than we did historically. Could this be because we've forgotten the lessons we've learned on how to live a healthy and productive life? Could we be better off if we embraced to lifestyles of our grandparents who were generally lean and healthy until late in life? Some lessons are only learned by listening to our bodies, paying attention and experimenting with what makes us ultimately happy. This makes me wonder, are there other lessons which should be embraced despite the prevailing opinions of society or experts?

2010-12-22T11:07:00.000-05:00

2010 Census, Food Safety and American Dependence

Yesterday the results of the 2010 US census were released telling us that there are about 309 million people living in the US. Indications are that people have moved from the North East and Midwest to the West and South. I don't find much of this surprising. In general people look for lower cost of living and more favorable climates, which other than the cost of living in Cali, can be associated with migratory trends. I expect in coming months and years we'll find out that there are "more people living in cities than ever before" commensurately that the rural population is shrinking and also that fewer Americans are involved in farming then every before. These are trends that have been observed before and I expect will continue to be reported in the 2010 census.

What this means is that fewer and fewer people are involved in the processes that put food on their own table or on the table of other Americans. I'm not talking about all the people involved in processing, distributing, delivering and selling food at you local grocery store, I'm talking about the producers, the farmers, the gardeners, the food preservers, seed savers and traders who not only feed themselves but also provide healthy, nutrient rich food for their family, neighbors and friends. For a long time, that's how we worked, you grew some of everything, enough to provide for yourself and any extra was sold or bartered locally. But with progress came specialization urbanization, and an aversion to the hard, dirty work of farming. Now it's easier for an average person to get a job selling junk on Ebay than it is to grow strawberries, make jam out of them, and sell the jam for a profit.

Farming is hard work. Hours in the blazing sun, breathing dusty air and suffering numerous mosquito bites isn't how a lot of people prefer to spend their days. It's certainly more pleasant to occupy a climate controlled cubicle and wither away hours at the water cooler, but at what cost?
From the Senate yesterday came what I interpret as even more bad news for those who wish to farm. S.510 FDA Food Safety Modernization Act seems to imply that anyone who wishes to produce food, be it lettuce, broccoli, beef, strawberry jam or pie filling for anything other than personal consumption needs to register with the FDA, pay a fee, and enact control measures to limit biological, chemical and physical hazards in their product. OK, doesn't sound that bad right? Well, when you're a small family farm, not a farm cooperation, operating on a near zero margin, more fees, QC procedures and record keeping cut into an already slim bottom line. These are not the facilities that are irrigating their crops with contaminated water, nor employing unsanitary conditions for their workers or keeping animals in toxic waste dumps. These are people trying to do the right thing for their family (which is unaffected by the new law) and their community (an act which is affected by the proposed law.) On the other hand, factory farms that specialize in monocropping and mass production won't see this regulation as burdensome, rather it will be "the cost of doing business." As we depend on these factory farms more and more, which is inevitable given the population migration, and the loss of the ability to self-sustain, I doubt that any of this legislation will substantially improve food safety.

What we need is not more accountants and lawyers, we need more farmers. Not factory farmers growing wheat, soybeans and corn, but people willing to forgo the comfortable cubicle life and take on the challenge of providing for themselves with their own two hands and sharing their hard work with their neighbors. Rather than centralized systems of production, a diffuse production scheme which encourages local, seasonal and sustainable ideas would better control the spread of food-borne illness than increasingly bureaucratic control of an unsustainable, untenable system. Americans need to end their dependence on the hard work of others, acknowledge that the food system starts at the ground level, with them, and tell the government to apply reason to food production not more regulation.

2010-02-20T15:00:00.000-05:00

Movie Review: King Corn

King Corn was released in 2006 and documents the adventures of two recent college graduates from Boston returning to Iowa to grow an acre of corn and follow the corn through it's life. Like much of the corn grown in the US, the corn grown on the King Corn acre was not the sweet corn common on late summer tables, rather it was dent corn aka field corn which is less a food and more a commodity. Dent corn is used as a cheap source of carbohydrates in animal feed (animals will convert the cheap carbs in corn to cheap protein) and also chemically converted to ethanol, high fructose corn syrup and corn oil.
Throughout the movie, the point is reiterated that growing corn for these purposes is itself unprofitable. In order to optimize production, the corn grown requires injecting ammonia into the soil, genetically modified corn and specialized herbicidal chemicals. Gone are the days of the family farm where mom and pop grow on their 40 acres the sustain themselves and take excess to market, rather land is now leased and cultivated in 1000 acre parcels by machinery that would be on the scale of a mining operation than a farm. Despite the efficiencies of scale, only through government subsidies can farmers turn a profit.
In the end, I can't say the movie provides an unbiased look at the factory farming. It does preys on the bucolic image of the family farm to raise contrast to the stark reality of factory farming. Since most viewers have never seen a farm and are unfamiliar with the processes employed to grow and process their food, King Corn, in an attempt to be an understated expose', fails to point out the efficiencies of scale that do come with factory farming. Indeed, an attempt is made to villainize former USDA Secretary of Agriculture Earl Butz (dec) who revamped the food production industry in the US.
The film does raise interesting questions... Since tax-paying citizens fund the government, we're basically paying to grow food that we can't eat and has little nutritional value; is this the best way to spend our money? Further, Is the trade-off of tax payer based subsidies I wonder, if given the opportunity, would these farmers choose to grow broccoli, cabbage, carrots or one of many more healthy and beneficial crops? What about the costs of environmental damage by pesticides, herbicides and the loss of biodiversity due to monocropping? Could crop rotation be used to mitigate the need for nitrogen injection and chemical sprays? How would our cost of life change if we didn't subsidize corn? How about our national health? Would the cost of sweeteners and other corn-derived products make soda and juice prohibitively expensive, thereby limiting consumption?
It is my hope to explore some of these questions as I develop this blog, so stay tuned to see what turns up.

2010-02-17T16:46:00.000-05:00

Life Changes and Re-dedication

It's been a while since I posted anything on this blog, but that doesn't mean the wheels haven't been turning. In the last year I've taken greater consideration of the impact of my life on others, and the impact of others on myself. I've made some substantial changes in the way I live and relate to others, but as always these things are a work in progress.

One of the biggest changes I've made is a substantial change in my diet which has effected my overall health, well-being and happiness. I've been a member of an organic farming co-operative for the last several years and have enjoyed fresh seasonal, organic produce throughout the summer and early fall months. I noticed that not only did I feel better when my diet was rich in vegetables, I no longer suffered what could be described as pre-diabetic symptoms that had plagued me through the winter months when my diet relied on oatmeal in the morning and pasta, rice or bread-based dishes throughout the day. Through on-going reading and searching for recipes I found a wonderful set of blogs associated with the low-carb community and espousing the "primal" lifestyle. Both Mark's Daily Apple and The Blog of Dr. Michael Eades have become daily readers for me. Both advocate for a low-carb, high-fat diet with intermittent fasting to achieve insulin balance in the body. MDA is more of a lifestyle blog that appeals to the Primal lifestyle which I'm adopting over time. Eades' blog appeals to my scientific side as his discussions can be both technical and intellectually stimulating. In his rigorous dissection of data, I find a kindred spirit.

My experience following the dietary recommendations of the Primal/ low-carb community has changed the way I function on a daily basis. The most obvious expression is the weight I've lost. In 2009 I topped the scales over 355 lbs had significant problems with lethargy, sleep apnea, and allergies. I found that I couldn't have a carb-heavy meal then have enough energy to even do the dishes. I was always hungry, I was on a insulin rollercoaster from the moment I woke up to the moment I went to bed. By cutting back on the simple carbohydrates I ate, I lost 30 lbs in 2009 without changing my daily routing substantially. My lethargy has been replaced with seemingly endless energy, my sleep apnea has disappeared and my immune function has improved (my allergy season has yet to occur for 2010, but I've been sick less this winter.) I'm no longer suffering from chronic dry-mouth and not coughing up dry brown mucus every morning (yeah, disgusting, I know.)

The changes I've noticed based on my experience have changed the way I think on a much larger scale. Combining my understanding of primary literature on caloric restriction, the role of micronutrients in the body and the biology of sirtuin proteins with the obesity epidemic in the US, the prevalence of Type 2 Diabetes, and my interest in sustainable, ecologically-sound, food production I've developed some concepts which I hope to develop further on this blog.

2008-04-08T10:44:00.000-04:00

Happy Brew Year!
75 years ago yesterday, Prohibition was repealed, at least enough to allow for the sale of 3.2 beer, and Americans could once again enjoy the magical elixir of barley, hops, and yeast. While this would be a minor holiday to some, I was happy to embrace this occasion by cleaning and resealing the keggerator, a suitable exercise for the holiday. She poured flawlessly and I celebrated with a couple glasses of a homebrewed altbeir! A tasty way to start the new Brew Year!
So as with any New Years type celebration, resolutions are in order... My Brew Years resolutions for this year are:

To incorporate beer into my cooking more throughly and to experiment with it more as an accompaniment to the meals I create.
To share my brewing knowledge with as many people as are interested in learning or willing to listen to me ramble on
To appreciate the product more while relying on the effect less
To continue/ resurrect the sub 1.040 beer series of experiments for my homebrewed beer
To clear out the cellar of HB and commercial beers in anticipation of relocation.

So there ya have it, my Brew Years Resolutions! Maybe you, fair reader, will be lucky enough to celebrate and share in my adventures in beer this year!

2008-04-02T17:27:00.000-04:00

Reclaiming my Blog

More than likely you don't want to know what has been going on in my life the last 18 months, so I'm just gonna roll like there was no interruption.
It was actually good to see Dan the past couple days. Lab's been quiet recently, only me, and the Diaz lab. It was refreshing to have some discussion of science and goals and stuff. But he's leaving again soon, ie tomorrow, and I'm totally good with that!
A couple weeks ago, I got to visit my family for Easter. John and Sarah hosted and presented us with a fine meal and tolerated the disruption of their routine most amicably. My niece Gigi is now about 20 months and is really cute. She's strong and smart but she's shy around men because John is the only man with whom she interacts regularly. Before I left I got a hi-five from her which made my day! She's really cute, I wish I could see her more often!
So that's the beginning of my reclamation project. Am I as angry and disillusioned as before, you bet! There will be plenty of rants and raves moving forward, but hopefully I won't offend more people than I already have!

2006-07-28T00:41:00.000-04:00

Cleveland Trip

I'm off to Cleveland in the AM to meet help my brother and sister-in-law and my new baby niece move back to the east coast. I could not be more excited about meeting my niece for the first time... sure, seeing my brother and sister-in-law will be nice, but my niece represents so much to me, and she's only a month old.
I showed my blog to a friend last night and she said, "Gosh, you're really cynical, you're totally not like that in person, why do you write that way?" Well, to be honest, I suppose I just don't play well with others. I have my life, I live in my world, I share my world with you. In my world there are not prejudices and everyone starts with a clean slate. The decisions and actions of those in my world which directly affect me will bias me and change my perception of the person taking the action or making the decision. I suppose that I'm cynical because I've projected a set of my own personal expectations onto people, their decisions, and their actions. People fail to meet these expectations because they are either unaware of them or don't share in those expectations.
I'm excited about meeting my niece this wekend, no matter what she does in her life, I'll love her. She has unlimited potential right now but no matter what course her life takes, she will always be my niece. Maybe I yearn for the innocence of childhood, maybe it's her newness but maybe because in my eyes she'll be forever incorruptable, I find the prospect of this new life, her present and future to be so full of hope that I will never grow cynical because of my relationship with her. Nothing she will do will curtain my love for her, and I find the concept of having such a pure relationship refreshing and revitalizing. Friends and aquaintenances come and go throughout life, but family is forever. My family is really my strength and tomorrow I get to meet the newest part of it!

A

2006-07-24T00:57:00.000-04:00

Stony Brook Film Festival

The Stony Brook Film Festival is in it's 11th year and I've attended portions of the last 3 years. This year's movies have by far been the best films I've seen screened at the festival. The shorts Volare and Transgression have been very good and I really enjoy the form. Short films are an incredible art form that really condense emotion and message into film less than 30 minutes in length but often less then 15 minutes long. Some of the full length features seem to get drawn out and lose a themselves in their indie-ness or artisticness, but by the emotion, passion and symbolism used in these short films is conveyed more suscinctly and effectively.
I wish more short film would be made available either thru the internet or at commercial movie theaters, unfortunately, running these emoton-packed nuggets of film would not be economically viable and thus, once again, because of our cash-driven economy, great work that could really change people's perceptions and challenge ideas is left to gather dust in university film collections.
I urge any and all readers of this blog to check out your local film festival when it comes around and support the production, distirbution and viewing of independent short films as well as full length movies and those theaters who show them, whenever possible.

2006-07-22T19:16:00.000-04:00

Shitting where you eat

There's an old addage that one should not shit where one eats. The implication is that to stay healthy and avoid disease born by the gastric workings of one's body, one should remove oneself from one's dining vacinity when defficating. Enteric bacteria which constitute 90% of mass of fecal matter can cause severe sickness and disease, thus there is truth to the addage.
Like much wisdom we as humans garnered over our many years of close contact with our environment, many people seem to have lost the implications of this old addage. Yes, modern technology and civil engineering have removed our defecant from our dining rooms, but the addage still hold true. Not only have people become too lazy and irresponsible to care about the condition of their direct living environment, but social responsibilty has allowed us to polute our only planet, essentially poisoning our selves, our mothership and our life force. This however is not purely an environmental rant, because in addition to the crap our modern chemical lifes spew, we produce plenty of mental, spiritual and emotional crap with which we poison ourselved and our relationships.
As I've said before and more than likely will say again, I belive the solution to this situation is a combination of personal actualization, personal responsibility and honesty. It is only by knowing oneself and the impact that one can have on their own life situation and the lives of those with whom we surround ourselves, either directly or indirectly, that we can really hope to improve the life of everyone. Selfishness and materialism will yet be downfall of you society if we let it. Only by accepting our individual roles as part of a functional society and realizing that our actions have greater implications, will we learn to respect the wisdom of those who told us not to shit where we eat.

2006-07-07T09:53:00.000-04:00

Science Craps Out!

Back in college, I took a class my freshman year in rhetorical analysis. I really didn't understand or appreciate the class at the time and thought it was a waste of time that could be better spent pursuing more relevant ends; however, I've recently come to appreciate what the class was trying to teach and when I saw the cover of the June 30 issue of Science, I could not help but to offer an analysis of the picture, with my own biased interpretation.
There are four major features on the cover, the banner: Science in large white letters agains what could be taken as a gameboard from the Game of Life. There is a graphic of a medical professional holding a clipboard with a somewhat androgenous being standing beside him with the words Life Cycles underneath. There is a set of dice, one showing a 5 and the other a 2. Finally, there is a deck of "event cards" similar to those of the Game of Life.
Taking the cover as a whole, one can appreciate the similarities to the Game of Life, and yes we all can in some ways relate to how we are on a track in life and while there may be different goals for different people, the paths tend to be similar, decisions of education, career, marriage, child-rearing etc are common to all people and could indeed be considered a life cycle as one generation cycles into the next. This however is clearly the journal Science and the design of the graphic implies that the game board illustrated is that of a reader of Science, namely an educated, passionate intellectual many of whom put their dedication and passion for science primary and their personal happiness secondary in their life course. It seems like the traditional path of life does not apply to these readers, not because the decisions are not the same, but because they, we, look at life from a different angle. Surely some consider science end the elucidation of the natural world their mission, however we do have a greater, and more fundamental role to play in this society and yet few accept thier job as mentors and role models as readily or as early in life. What is worse is that the 7 rolled on the dice, considered a natural in the game of Craps, indicates a winning roll. Is it truely a winning roll for society when the intellectuals put their career before themselves and their family. Compounding this is the text of the Event Card in the picture which reads, "No dates last month! Move back two spaces." When the intellectuals are engaged in pursuit of their passion, the personal life that is so critical to one's well being and happiness takes a back seat to their passion for science. Not that we don't love life and enjoy sharing our life experiences with others, but often intellectuals find it difficult to relate to those who lack passion in their professional careers, and thus we are penalized moving us backwards in the Game of Life.
It is only by balancing our careers with our personal lives that we can hope to find happiness and progress and enrich both. A life dedicated to intellectual pursuit is not for everyone nor is family life, but we often fool ourselves into thinking that our work will make us happy. While Science may not have intended to do so, they have encapsulated the strugges of many in the academic profession on their cover, stigmatizing the academic life as a lonely pursuit which fails to balance the personal needs for personal progession with professional advancement. I agrue that while many academics, and single graduate students, can relate to this, it further alienates intelligent people who may wish to consider, and could contribute significantly to, an intellectual life from pusuing such because our the life of the academic derails us so significantly from the Game of Life.

2006-06-17T20:10:00.000-04:00

The Graduate Army
Sorry for the long lag between posting, been a crazy time in the World of Bobes.
I was thinking today, I know that gets me in trouble often, but as a graduate student it is kinda my job. Anyway I was thinking about a banner I saw hanging on a garage in my neighborhood last night. The banner read "Welcome Home Michael- U.S.M.C." It got me to thinking, why don't people celebrate the graduate student like they celebrate a son/daughter/ sibling in the military?
I'm not saying that service for one's country should not be celebrated, but that we should expand our appreciation of the people who enrich this country as well as protect it.
Let me expand on the similarities between military service and grad school. Graduate students and military recruits are not that different in age. Both groups are in the early to mid 20s range when recruited. Both commit to long terms of service, 2-9 years of their life. Both groups undergo significant training to allow them to effectively do their job. Both are poorly paid and taken for granted by society at large. Both represent groups who are trying to improve their lot in life.
You may argue that a nation needs an army, a society doesn't need intelectuals, as long as there's a work force. I disagree, just as a nation needs an army, a society needs innovators, leaders and artists to enrich the life experience of the rest of society and advance the society beyond its current state.
Some may argue that service in the military is inhereantly dangerous and those who serve put their lives on the line everyday. While this is true, graduate students do the same, whether it is engineering supercoliders, handeling novel chemotherapeutics, braving the jungles of Africa or using materials so toxic that OSHA doesn't want to create an MSDS for it, graduate students risk life, limb and their future well-being for the pursuit of knowledge.
So why are graduate students looked down upon? Do we not contribute to the society by defending our intellectual freedoms ? Are we not sacraficing some of the best years of our lives toward to the service and advancement of society?
So what's my point? Don't overlook the intelectuals in society, while they may not get to trot around with a gun and grenades, they still deserve our respect for their contributions to society. So hug your local grad student when you get a chance.

2006-04-01T10:06:00.000-05:00

2006-04-01T09:36:00.000-05:00

Immigration
Recently the Washington political machine has decided to push immigration reform as action point for national security and homeland defense. Yet again, the politicians have missed the mark when guaging the will of the public and their actions reek of elitist philosophy and racism.
The United States is a nation of immigrants, whether they be european, african, middle eastern or latino, the US is what it is because people have wanted to come here to find a better life and have worked hard to achieve that goal. It's part of the melting pot of american society and what has made this nation the dominant world economic, technoligical, philosophical and scientific entity in the world. The US owes great debts to immigrants whether they be the irish housekeepers and laborers of the 1900s, the german scientists of WW2 or the latino day laborers of today. Without them the US could not be what it is and our national quality of living would be much lower than it is.
The unfortunate reality is that those who depend most on immigrant labor to provide affordable daycare, custodial services, or manual labor are not the people who want immigration reform, the men driving this debate are those most removed from the economic reality of the average citizen. This disconnect between the voting public and the elected officials is a glaring problem with the industrialization of government service. Instead of doing the will of their constituants, "public servants" are instead using their position of power to oppress those without a voice. Just like the irish and the chinesse before them, latino immigrants are being exploited by the overwhelming weathy populace of the US; however to maintain our status in the world the US depends on the labor of these immigrants. To criminalize their presence could result in not only an increased incarceration rate of immigrants which would add to our already taxed prison system and heavy tax burden, but also damage our economy by increasing the costs associated with everyday goods and services, thus straining the already tight budgets of the average american.
What we need is not criminization of illegal status, nor do we need to declare an amnesty for all immigrants currently in the US but we need a system by which immigrants can be registered and allowed to stay in the US as long as they maintain a job and add to our economy. I suppose this falls into the Guest Worker Program the president is pushing ( I really don't believe that I wrote that) but we really need to look hard at how this will be implemented and the economic impact that this is going to have on the average american and not the bearucrats in DC.

2006-03-14T10:33:00.000-05:00

Having Hand...
There's a great Seinfeld episode about "having hand" as it pertains to having control in a relationship. There's a memorable quote in which the woman George is dating breaks up with him, but he crys out, "You can't break up with me, I have hand!"
Do relationships really involve that kind of power structure? Is someone always the dominat position over the other? I think so, but should it be? Not ideally.
The best relationships are the ones in which there is an equal sharing and open communication, but this rarely happens. I'm luck that I have a group of friends who simply accept me for who I am. They stand by me when I need support, they criticize me when I need criticism, we laugh, we cry, these are my good friends, there is no judging, there is no "hand."
These relationships though are people I've known more than half my life now. We've grown together from adolescents to adults. In my more recent relationships, there is definitely a sense on "hand," especially when it comes to women. As I posted before, I often behave like a puppy dog in the presence of an attractive woman, thus automatically taking a submissive role in the relationship. I don't like this position and have set about trying to change that. I want my relationships with the fairer sex to be more even-handed but to get there I need to take some sense of control, something I have only recently done. Boy does it feel good!
I must avoid the trap of having a sense of too much control though because just when one thinks they have control of a relationship, is when one loses it. The last thing I want is to be drunk on power and lose the hand I'm playing. As the woman who broke up with George retorted to his cry, "...and you're gonna need it!" That's the last thing I want!
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2006-03-09T15:19:00.000-05:00

Pushover

I had resolved not to be involved in any more recruiting activities for Stony Brook. Not that I didn't enjoy the activities associated with the recruiting process, meeting new people, decent lunches and dinners but I didn't want to lie to people anymore and convince them that Stony Brook was a good place to go to grad school. Well, push came to shove today and I was asked to participate in a recruiting dinner this evening. I'll do it, but what really bothers me is the way I was asked.
So I was working away when a friend called the lab today, I was in the midst of things and was not really thinking about the evening. I had made plans to have dinner at Green Cactus and attend a movie screening of an independent movie Loser's Lounge with a friend. Same friend calls up and instantly I could tell by the tome of her voice that she wanted something, she was speaking the that kinda soft somewhat sweet southern drawl she uses when she asks for favors. Seems like she was recruited to attend this dinner with perspective student, cool, then she asked me if I wanted to attend, because there was not enough people attending.
As I said, I really don't want to do any more of these, and I had made that clear to her and to the people in charge of the grad student recruiting process. I had succeeded in avoiding particpating in any of these events up to this point but damn the trickery, I had just committed to attend a recruiting dinner.
Why does this bother me so? It seems I'm a pushover, I'll do anything for a female if she asks right. I'll drive through the ice and rain to change a tire despite the incompetence of the male on the scene. I'll cancel plans I've had for months to pick a friend up from the train station. Hell, I'll toss my principles if asked. If I don't have my prinicples, I'm nothing.
Sure some could say, oh I'm just a nice guy. But I really feel that I'm jello in the hands of female-kind. Why? Because I don't understand them? Because I haven't killed my catholic conscience? Because I don't get laid enough? Aaarrrggghh! I really don't know why I'm like this, but it bothers me, and I really wish it didn't. Relationships, even between friends are not about control, but it seems sometimes that I'm one of Pavlov's dogs just waiting for the bell to ring but in my case, the bell is the sweet sensual voice of a woman.
Gotta go to dinner now.
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